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I posted this a while back on another forum. Thought ya'll might enjoy it here if you hadn't seen it before...........you guys using the buttons may not appreciate this as much as us old guys.
"Kick-starting a Harley .."
Go to the bike, fingers crossed, say a prayer.
Make sure engine oil spot to know it still has oil.
Look for tranny seal oil spot on the ground to ensure it has fluid.
Turn on the choke.
Kick the bike over a few times with the switch off to get it primed.
Spin it through until you get compression.
Turn the switch on.
Kick until you have to wipe the snot from your face.
Take a break to catch your breath, count the number of people who gathered around, try to look like this is standard procedure
Realize you are now in middle of the street, roll the bike back onto driveway, that explains the laughter.
Try to act as if you don't notice the crowd snickering.
Think, must be flooded.
Turn off the choke.
Hold the throttle wide ****ing open.
Kick..kick...kick... wipe the tear/snot/sweat/nose bleed combo from your face.
Cuss.
Kick some more.
Cuss.
Ignore the old man who says......you know, back in the day.......
Kick until you are back in the street again.
Cuss.
Don't even wipe, just swallow the combo.
Check the points.
Turn on the choke.
Hold the throttle WFO, kick until the neighbors wife says.......you don't look so good.
swallow.
Check the plugs.
Turn off the choke.
Notice that you have never turned the gas on.
#%@@*($^@^@&*#(#(@
Turn gas on.
Turn choke on.
Prime engine.
Threaten motorcycle.
KICK !!
Pick youself up from the ground in front of motorcycle.
Put out the fire in the air cleaner.
Remember to retard the timing this go-around.
Turn on the ignition.
Kick.
Engine starts.......dies.
swallow the combo.
Kick.....success
Check gas in tank, realize there is only about a quart, meaning you will have to go through this again in about 10 minutes.
straddle bike, look both ways for traffic, realize you are in the middle of the street again.
Ride away thinking........ screw those electric start pansies......I'm the real deal.
__________________
UF
"Kick-starting a Harley .."
Go to the bike, fingers crossed, say a prayer.
Make sure engine oil spot to know it still has oil.
Look for tranny seal oil spot on the ground to ensure it has fluid.
Turn on the choke.
Kick the bike over a few times with the switch off to get it primed.
Spin it through until you get compression.
Turn the switch on.
Kick until you have to wipe the snot from your face.
Take a break to catch your breath, count the number of people who gathered around, try to look like this is standard procedure
Realize you are now in middle of the street, roll the bike back onto driveway, that explains the laughter.
Try to act as if you don't notice the crowd snickering.
Think, must be flooded.
Turn off the choke.
Hold the throttle wide ****ing open.
Kick..kick...kick... wipe the tear/snot/sweat/nose bleed combo from your face.
Cuss.
Kick some more.
Cuss.
Ignore the old man who says......you know, back in the day.......
Kick until you are back in the street again.
Cuss.
Don't even wipe, just swallow the combo.
Check the points.
Turn on the choke.
Hold the throttle WFO, kick until the neighbors wife says.......you don't look so good.
swallow.
Check the plugs.
Turn off the choke.
Notice that you have never turned the gas on.
#%@@*($^@^@&*#(#(@
Turn gas on.
Turn choke on.
Prime engine.
Threaten motorcycle.
KICK !!
Pick youself up from the ground in front of motorcycle.
Put out the fire in the air cleaner.
Remember to retard the timing this go-around.
Turn on the ignition.
Kick.
Engine starts.......dies.
swallow the combo.
Kick.....success
Check gas in tank, realize there is only about a quart, meaning you will have to go through this again in about 10 minutes.
straddle bike, look both ways for traffic, realize you are in the middle of the street again.
Ride away thinking........ screw those electric start pansies......I'm the real deal.
__________________
UF
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