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  • The ride of the snake

    :cool:

    The wife and I decided to take a ride yesterday. She wanted to go two up, it's been awhile so why not. Decided to go to Kirksville for lunch about 140 miles one way through the winding rolling hills of the Missouri farm lands. We were about 80 miles into our ride when I see something in the road. I move a bit to the right to avoid it, but the side wall of my front tire just barley rolled over it. It was a damn king snake in the road, the tire caught it and flipped it up and it got hung up on my left leg just below my knee, it's head flapping behind me. Damn thing latched onto my wifes boot just above the ankle. All of a sudden she's pounding the top of my helmet yelling snake, snake, all awhile kicking her leg back and forth. I head to the side of the road and before I'm stopped she's off the bike and continuing her kicking to get the snake off. Now I got to tell you, my wife is a 3rd degree black belt in Tai Kwon Do, she has been for a long while, she is fearless. I've seen her in the ring and a couple times out of it, I have never seen anyone able to stand up to her round house 540. It's a thing of beauty. But that damn snake hung in there, flipping like a bull whip at the end of her kicks. I wasn't about to get anywhere close to that, the snake or her foot. Then I hear tires screeching and a woop, woop, I looked up to see a MO. State Trooper pulled over and heading our way, yelling stop, stop, well I guess she heard him too because she stopped and just stood there looking kind of pale. The snake let go and slithered off into the weeds. The Trooper demanded to know what was going on, he was sure we were in the middle of a domestic altercation. We told him what happened, but with no snake to back it up. I guess it did look kind of funny, her kicking like crazy, me standing just out of reach with my hands up yelling, baby stop, stop kicking, stop. The trooper never saw the snake, just all the commotion. When we were finished telling him our story, he just stood there looking at us (still in all our riding gear) like we were on drugs. About that time here comes the snake out of the weeds right toward the disbelieving trooper. He started dancing like a little girl learning to tap. My wife saying you see, I told you, you SOB, me, well, I'm just standing there laughing at the whole thing. I was sure Barney was going for the bullet in his pocket. The snake headed on across the road, the trooper headed back to his car shaking his head, me, well, now I'm doubled over I'm laughing so hard, all I could do is point at the ground and mimic the troopers little dance. I could swear that trooper gave me the finger when he went by, that made me laugh even more. My sides still hurt. Oh, we did finally make it for lunch and it was great. Best damn lunch ride we've had in a long, long time. Watch out for ole sneeky snake folks, he's still out there. Somewhere....
    Herd # 76
    I didn't buy a Sportster because I wanted a Harley, I bought a Sportster because it's OLD S'COOL

  • #2
    Great story! That would be priceless to see!
    Jeff
    09 FLHRCI
    Herd Member #00045

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    • #3
      Think the trooper's tellin any snake stories??
      Miles are on a road map, close to home is here
      Very Proud member #99
      Official Herd Hugger
      Count your life by smiles, not tears:
      Count your age by friends, not years.
      Old bikers don't gray, they CHROME OUT!!

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      • #4
        Only thing that would make this story better would be pictures. Glad everyone is ok though...
        The hardest part about a Zombie Apocalypse, will be pretending I'm not excited!

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        • #5
          LMAO... :)
          Joe

          2009 FLHTCU Ultra Classic - Vivid Black
          Brand #121

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          • #6
            We must all hang together, or assuredly we shall all hang separately. Ben Franklin 1776
            Potentially, a government is the most dangerous threat to man's rights: it holds a legal monopoly on the use of physical force against legally disarmed victims. Ayn Rand
            All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. Edmund Burke

            Herd Member #00101

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            • #7
              Great story. Another reason to wear boots.
              Herd Member #43
              Free Markets, Free Minds
              Rolling Thunder

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              • #8
                Originally posted by JimP View Post
                Only thing that would make this story better would be pictures. Glad everyone is ok though...
                Hmm without pictures did it really happen? Glad everyone is ok!









                HERD Member #114
                2007 FLHTCU Ultra Classic
                When all else fails, GET A BIGGER HAMMER!
                If common sense was so common, wouldn't everyone have it?

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                • #9
                  Would you really of thought to get pictures?
                  Herd # 76
                  I didn't buy a Sportster because I wanted a Harley, I bought a Sportster because it's OLD S'COOL

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                  • #10
                    What a great story.....
                    x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x
                    HERD member #66
                    HS I Survivor
                    HS II Survivor
                    HS III Survivor
                    HS IV,V,VI wanted to go.....

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by xlcruser View Post
                      Would you really of thought to get pictures?
                      Nope would have never crossed my mind, but a little sarcasm did.
                      HERD Member #114
                      2007 FLHTCU Ultra Classic
                      When all else fails, GET A BIGGER HAMMER!
                      If common sense was so common, wouldn't everyone have it?

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                      • #12
                        lololol:)
                        Appalachian Redneck

                        "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely, in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used and worn out, loudly proclaiming, "WOW!!! WHAT A RIDE!!!"

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                        • #13
                          Great story! I need to send this to Big Red, she is a lifelong snake hater!
                          Mike Tickle
                          Herd # One hundred
                          2012 Ultra Limited
                          USAF Retired (SMSgt)

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                          • #14
                            Now that is just too funny. thanks for a great story.
                            Herd #00049 formerly Soccer... Time for a change

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                            • #15
                              :laughout made for the days topic around the table...glad it wasn't no worse then that.
                              HERD Member #00086
                              09 FXDF "PABS"

                              R.I.P. Rick Massey "Double secret agent 00019......"
                              Rubberdown, Ride forever more in peace brother

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