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  • Why I'm divorced

    Why I'm divorced.........

    Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that
    morning..

    I went downstairs for breakfast
    Hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
    'Happy Birthday!',
    And possibly have a small present for me.

    As it turned out,
    She barely said good morning,
    Let alone
    ' Happy Birthday.'

    I thought....

    Well, that's marriage for you,
    But the kids....
    They will remember.

    My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
    And didn't say a word..
    So when I left for the office,
    I felt pretty low
    And somewhat despondent.

    As I walked into my office,
    My secretary Jane said,
    'Good Morning Boss,
    And by the way
    Happy Birthday ! '
    It felt a little better
    That at least someone had remembered.

    I worked until one o'clock ,
    When Jane knocked on my door
    And said, 'You know,
    It's such a beautiful day outside,
    And it is your Birthday,
    What do you say we go out to lunch,
    Just you and me..'
    I said, 'Thanks, Jane,
    that's the greatest thing
    I've heard all day.
    Let's go !'

    We went to lunch.
    But we didn't go
    Where we normally would go.
    She chose instead at a quiet bistro
    With a private table.
    We had two martinis each
    And I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

    On the way back to the office,
    Jane said, 'You know,
    It's such a beautiful day...
    We don't need to go straight back to the office,
    Do We ?'

    I responded,
    'I guess not.
    What do you have in mind ?'
    She said,
    'Let's drop by my apartment,
    it's just around the corner..'

    After arriving at her apartment,
    Jane turned to me and said,

    ' Boss, if you don't mind,
    I'm going to step into the bedroom
    For just a moment.
    I'll be right back.'
    'Ok.' I nervously replied.

    She went into the bedroom and,
    After a couple of minutes,
    She came out
    Carrying a huge birthday cake ...
    Followed
    By my wife,
    My kids,
    And dozens of my friends
    And co-workers,
    All singing 'Happy Birthday'.


    And I just sat there....

    On the couch....

    Naked.




    Please delete if it had been already posted, I just got this today. :0
    08 FLSTC - cus we likes to ride! HERD#146 - Thanks Classy! USN - Retired
    When I wear an "Old Navy" shirt, it is not a fashion statement, it is just a statement.
    Looking at life from the back of the HERD....All I see is...well, you know! :)

  • #2
    OUCH,thata hurt fer aa while.ed:fall:windy:violin:aahhh
    Ear Tag no. 00030

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    • #3
      i heard similar story but with a wife, peanut butter and a dog

      thats the internet for ya
      Last edited by colonelangus; 09-12-2010, 06:26 PM.
      09 Softail Springer FLSTFBT "AKA" Heritage Fatbones Touring
      www.youtube.com/user/bcvtwin?feature=mhee

      herd #148

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      • #4


        Didn't see that coming!!! Awesome post!!!
        OLD SKOOL BIKERS RULE, WE DO WHAT IT TAKES AND LIKE IT!!!
        With age comes wisdom, yeah right!
        FIRST "HERD BIKE OF THE MONTH CLUB MEMBER"
        RIP Rick.....Ride On Forever In Our Hearts My Brother!

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        • #5
          Caught me totally by surprise !!!!
          Good one !
          Herd #124
          Age 10 and holding
          Official Herd Poser

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          • #6
            HAHAHA, poor fugger.
            Expectations managed for free

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            • #7
              :ouch:ouch:laughouted
              Miles are on a road map, close to home is here
              Very Proud member #99
              Official Herd Hugger
              Count your life by smiles, not tears:
              Count your age by friends, not years.
              Old bikers don't gray, they CHROME OUT!!

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              • #8
                Ahhhh, they got you too huh?
                Ride in Peace Wndchsr


                www.my.doterra.com/jbush

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                • #9
                  :dan
                  U.S. Army "Retired"
                  (Disabled Veteran)

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                  • #10
                    :laughout
                    Patti, HERD Georgia Girl #113

                    RubberDown/Double Secret Agent #19 and Ozzyrral #213...RIP
                    We will ride again wndchsr...
                    'If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun.' - Katherine Hepburn

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                    • #11
                      OFFICIAL HERD MEMBER #83
                      2014 FLHXS
                      U.S. NAVY Veteran

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